Amerika

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Sports Imitates Clown World

ESPN serves a unique and perverse purpose. It tells us stories, through the medium of mediocre sports journalism, that show us just how ridiculous Clown World has become. It now seems that making the teams shake hands after a college basketball game is now too great of a risk.

We’ve had the conversation about the value of handshake lines for years. Every time there is a problem after a game, we begin to question their purpose.

This bloviating bilge stems from a sporting post-game encounter between the gentlemen of Texas Art and Music University- Commerce and those of Incarnate Word University. What a shame the incarnate words of the day were apparently expletives.

The brawl, which broke out during the handshake line, lasted for more than a minute and spilled across the floor.

Four players from each team were suspended for “flagrantly unsportsmanlike conduct.”

I’m not sure what triggers the gag reaction first. There is ESPN arguing for the abolition of sportsmanship and then there is the fact that these eight pseudo-sapient morons were ever given tuition-free educations to begin with. The whole situation is utter garbage based on pretense.

Abolish both of these basketball teams and the problem stops cold. Incarnate Word can get back in the business of recruiting a student body literate enough to not sit through a Latin Mass in gob-smacked ignorance. Texas Art and Music can find good replacements at the next statewide 4H event.

College athletics are a colossal source of fraud and embarrassment. ESPN finds them an ongoing revenue source for The Devil Mouse. ESPN therefore looks to hide the rot and decay. Abolishing handshake lines keeps people from seeing the thugs under Clown World’s masks.

Both of these universities ostensibly exist for some reason other than holding gladiatorial spectacles for corrupt media networks. It’s not the handshake lines that need to go. It’s the rot and decay that allows people of such dismal character to hold any position from which they can display their barbaric degeneration.

It’s easy to pass this off as two packs of sub-literate knee-grows performing for cameras, sort of like how we made fun of Jed Clampett a generation ago. But it’s not just sportsball where standards are thrown out to ditch embarrassment. Look at how inflation numbers are calculated now versus pre-1996.

When people can’t do the job, things like handshake lines get removed from the description before too many other people notice. Anything that shows us how funny Clown World really is gets removed. When two groups of ostensibly educated men can’t even shake hands after a sports competition, maybe the whole LARP over a Second Amerikan Civil War isn’t just nerdball after all.

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