Amerika

Ah, the tough, hard life on the bleeding edge of The Alternative Right* …Why, it’s a regular Ballad of Dwight Fry.

Well, it is according to this paper in The American Journal of Political !$CIENCE! You see according to the authors of “Correlation not Causation: The Relationship between Personality Traits and Political Ideologies,” I’m just one little sick phlegm-wad of psychological difficulties. These “researchers” may even have a point there that isn’t on the top of their conical, little heads. However, my fetishes, such as they are have little to do with my voting and blogging behaviors that induce nausea in dyed-in-the-Commie-Flag Bernie Sandernistas.

You see, I’d always walked around assuming that I became Right Wing from watching Leftists make both Detroit and The Soviet Union collapse into utter ruin. I also always kind of figured that traditional marriages with one mommy plus one daddy equaled kids having two parents and one or two pay checks to help them grow up happy, wealthy and wise. But no, Dr. Genius tells me it’s all just a coping mechanism** to handle my neurotic insecurities. It’s probably a mental illusion – just like my crazy insistence on actually practicing religion instead of making fun of the sky fairies along with the intellectual sophisticates.

So if you’ve ever like mathed before or something, this passage from the paper is a nice, amusing Progressive monkey-spank manifesto of sorts.

The bottom-left panel of Figure 2 presents the analysis for Social Desirability and social ideology. In this analysis, the paths from A1 and E1 to social ideology are relatively small, suggesting the genetic and unique environmental influences are not significantly shared for these traits. Thus, the relationship between Social Desirability and social ideology seems to be primarily a function of the common environmental variance shared between these two traits. This is compatible with theoretical implications of Social Desirability, as it is not generally considered a core personality trait. This is an important finding, as it differs from any other result on personality and political preferences. Finally, the relationship between Neuroticism and economic ideology is very similar to the relationship for P and ideological dimensions. The A1 cross-path is substantively meaningful while the E1 cross-path is not, suggesting that the relationship between Neuroticism and economic liberalism is primarily a function of shared genetic variance, with approximately two-thirds of the correlation being a function of additive genetic covariance in both sexes.

You see, Conservatives can’t help but rely on coping mechanisms because it’s genetically hard-wired. It’s HBD. The result of methed-up 2nd cousins gettin’ pootie-tang in the double-wide like Dylan Storm Roof. The poor inbred dearies can’t help their causal relation between neurosis and economic conservatism. Oh, the Faulknerian tragedy of White, Southern culture on the skids…Oh Absalom. Oh wait!

You see Retraction Watch Blog has detected a fly in the ointment. Lefty is predictably filled to the brim with that which makes the gardener’s compost bin smell pungently.

Researchers have fixed a number of papers after mistakenly reporting that people who hold conservative political beliefs are more likely to exhibit traits associated with psychoticism, such as authoritarianism and tough-mindedness. As one of the notices specifies, now it appears that liberal political beliefs are linked with psychoticism. That paper also swapped ideologies when reporting on people higher in neuroticism and social desirability (falsely claiming that you have socially desirable qualities); the original paper said those traits are linked with liberal beliefs, but they are more common among people with conservative values.

You see, I’m Alt-Right and I’ll tell you flat-out I’d get paid and laid a whole lot more frequently if I weren’t an obnoxious, has-been/never-was rugby prop who is too busy making one end drink to ever quite get them both to appropriately meet. No inner need to prevaricate about how fat I look in the horizontally stripped rugby jersey. Having socially attractive personality traits would attract other people and I generally think other people typically suck. It gets even more disappointing as I continue to read the takedown on Retraction Watch.

In the paper, the authors are clear that “psychoticism” doesn’t mean “psychotic.” Rather: Having a high Psychoticism score is not a diagnosis of being clinically psychotic or psychopathic. Rather, P is positively correlated with tough-mindedness, risk-taking, sensation-seeking, impulsivity, and authoritarianism…As such, we expect higher P scores to be related to more conservative political attitudes, particularly for militarism and social conservatism.

I mean sh!t. At least psychotic could give you goth/emo cred. It looks a lot more professional on my Ace of Spades NRX Death Cards. That right there totally clarifies that these authors made this garbage up because they hate the continued existence of any political thought to the right of say Mumia. Yeah, keep trying you pathetic and worthless tossers. As long as I remember my suntan lotion this summer, I just won’t be feeling The Bern.

*-Am still accepting suggestions for good html sarcasm tags.
**-I guess I can’t just get a kitten instead because I’m Alt-Right and tend to use those to practice rugby drop-kicking with.

Tags: alternative right, leftism, political science